Well, the Jackasses and Elephants have both wrapped up their ‘08 conventions. We now have two super tickets from which to choose, AHEM (please forgive the internal polls and focus groups, they know not what they have done . . . to both parties). Should McCain win, here’s some advice for a favorite local resident:
RUN VULCAN, RUN!
See, Sen. John McCain, that great cavalier fighting everybody else’s pork (why else keep reelecting our Senate jokers if they can’t build up enough seniority to cash in for their respective states?), saw fit to criticize Sen. Richard Shelby for securing some federal funding for the restoration of the Statue of Vulcan in Birmingham, Alabama. Never mind that Vulcan is the largest cast-iron statue in the world, a venerable antique, and Birmingham’s most spectacular landmark. (Hey, quit kvetching about your tax money going to this–there’s precious little to visit in B’ham as it is, must have something to visit when you come here from yonder places.)
So, perhaps B’ham’s mayor, Larry Langford, will take up a collection at the next burlap and ashes rally to buy running shoes for Vulcan as sandals won’t do. McCain may come after Vulcan to get the money back. Scrap iron goes for a high rate!
[Note to B’ham expatriates: a slight twist on the pedastal has him mooning Channel 13’s studios now instead of Homewood.]
Glad to know that the “moon over Homewood” jokes can cease. We were at Vulcan not long after the park reopened (following the renovation). It looks great, and the museum was great, but I do not like the new/old observation deck! Sure, the 70s concrete thing was ugly, but I felt a lot more secure looking out of those windows than I did standing on that metal deck that had HOLES IN THE FLOOR! Did they have to use a floor that looks like a spaghetti strainer! One of our children only stayed out there about 30 seconds.
The scary observation deck was a complaint in the old days that might have led to the 70s(?) version. I remember my KINDERGARTEN class going to see Vulcan Park when the enclosed observation deck was new or newish. John Katapodis wanted to open up a view to the statue while leaving that deck intact, which I thought was a good plan.